I watch a disgustingly large amount of movies. Far too many to review here, at least without taking precious time away from watching disgustingly large amounts of movies. So why not do a weekly breakdown of what's coming out on DVD/Bluray and what's worth watching? I guess the fact that renting DVD's may not be a thing anymore. That's probably a good reason not to do it. But here we are anyway! Read on!

It's tough to get a hold of quality images for any episode, especially this one, hence two-face kitty.

Watching Phantom of the Auditorium reminded me of an incident that happened when I was in the fifth grade. I remember I had brought several Goosebumps books with me to class. I can’t remember the reason. I want to say it was for show and tell, but I’d like to believe I had something better to bring in than books anyone can just go to the store and buy. Anyway, at the end of the day I noticed several of them, including Phantom of the Auditorium, had been taken from my desk. The next morning, my classmate brought in Goosebump books he claimed he went and bought the previous night. The rub? They were the exact same ones taken from me the previous day! Oh and did I mention my fucking name was written inside one of them? The last I heard about that kid he was repeating the 8th grade, and apparently the signs were there years earlier.

Anyway, let’s talk about the episode! There’s not a whole lot to say, hence the preamble.

Now THIS one I remember. If I recall correctly, Welcome to Camp Nightmare was a favourite of mine in the Goosebumps book series. I must have really loved this episode of the show too because I remember it strangely well. The dialogue beats, the story beats, I knew everything that was going to happen and it was a strange feeling because I don’t have any memory of seeing this beyond it’s initial airing. So the only rational explanation is - I have one of them genius brains.

The use of Cuckoo Clock of Doom for the second Goosebumps episode was a strange decision so going into the third I wasn’t at all sure what to expect. It turns out though, I actually remember The Girl Who Cried Monster, or at least the cover of the book. You can guess exactly how the story will play out based purely on that title, but it’s all about the execution and I’m happy to report this is an improvement over the last episode.

Ladies and Gentlemen, my new obsession. The Game Center CX DVD set arrived last week and I devoured it, finishing it up in about 4 days. You ever finish a DVD set and felt actively depressed that it was done? A few days ago I would have answered a resounding no. But I’m certain a single tear rolled down my check when I was kicked back to the menu at the end of the last disc. I have now started my quest to find and watch every single episode I can get my hands on, and there are a lot! You don’t even need to read my review, just buy this! Actually wait stop! Read my review! Get on in here!

I ended the last review by recalling that this show started to get real bad as it progressed in its run. I was more on the nose than I thought because as it turns out, it gets bad almost immediately. Maybe “bad” is too harsh, but “far less good” is certainly not an understatement as we go to the second episode - The Cuckoo Clock of Doom.

You remember Goosebumps? No not the undeniably incredible series of books but the far less discussed TV show adaptation? “Kinda” you say? Well then it sounds like you need some dude on the Internet to write a review of every single episode! And that’s me! Maybe! I tend to get bored! So we’ll see!

 
YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!

Out of the dozens of horror remakes to come out in the last decade or so, Evil Dead seemed to get the most people upset. Maybe the outcry was worse for Texas Chainsaw Massacre, I don’t remember now. But people were NOT happy at the idea of someone remaking The Evil Dead. What’s strange though, is that unlike most horror remakes, they seemed to be doing a lot right with this one. Sam Raimi was on board as producer, as was Bruce Campbell. Ash as a character was nowhere to be found so you didn’t have to worry about someone trying to ape that performance (which would be the worst). Plus fucking Michael Bay’s company Platinum Dunes was not involved in any capacity. People still weren’t having it though. Though in all fairness, a lot of those people were saying how this version would never be able to make the same balance of horror/comedy, forgetting that The Evil Dead was actually a pretty dark horror movie.

Don’t get me wrong, I love the original trilogy but this wasn’t on my list of “Don’t You Dare Remake This” movies. That list is pretty much just Back to the Future. Oh Jesus don’t remake Back to the Future. Even going in optimistic though, I was very impressed with Evil Dead and may even go as far as to say it’s amongst the best of the recent horror remakes.

I have vivid memories of seeing The Grudge opening weekend with a friend of mine and finding it terrifying. It was a packed theatre and everyone was completely into it, making for a grand ole time at the cinema. Following that viewing I never went back to it, though I did experience a constant phenomena of recommending the movie to people, only to have them come back slightly baffled that I told them to watch it. Lots of “I don’t know, it was OK I guess” reactions. Was my memory of this movie off? Or no, was it all of them who were wrong? The time came to finally find out as I popped my neglected DVD copy of The Grudge into the player.